Domestic Violence Survival Strategies
Once a violent act takes place in a relationship, the violence almost always re-occurs. It tends to get more severe and more frequent as time goes on. This happens even when the abuser apologizes and promises to change after a violent incident.
Before an attack.....
- MAKE CONTACTS--Contact the victim advocate to find out what you can do the next time your abuser becomes violent.
- HAVE QUICK ACCESS--To a phone, cash, clothing, and important items such as car title and keys, birth certificates and social security cards for yourself and the children, insurance or Medicaid cards, insurance cards and shot records, records of our spouses income, their birth date, and social security number, a list of family, friends, and doctor's phone numbers, credit cards, blank checks, and bank books. Keep an emergency kit with keys, cash, and essential papers together in an old purse or other small container so that you can easily and quickly grab for it and leave.
During an attack.....
- DEFEND and PROTECT yourself.
- CALL FOR HELP--Scream loudly and continuously. You have nothing of which you should be ashamed. They do.
- GET AWAY--Escape if you can. Go to a relatives or friend's house or a domestic violence shelter.
- CALL THE POLICE--The police must now attempt to protect you from further abuse. They will arrest your abuser if they have enough evidence and refer you to the victim advocate who will provide or arrange transportation to a hospital or safe place.
After an attack.....
- SEEK MEDICAL ATTENTION--Tell them what happened. Ask them to take pictures of your injuries. Follow the medical options offered.
- MAKE A POLICE REPORT--Even if you do not want your abuser arrested. It will help in the future.
- SAVE EVIDENCE--Including medical and police reports, dated photos of the scene and your injuries, torn clothing, any weapons used, and statements from witnesses.
- TALK TO THE ADVOCATE--The advocate understands and can provide support, crisis intervention, access to shelter, safety planning, help with Ex Parte Orders of Protection and intercede on our behalf with family, friends, law enforcement, the prosecutor, your employer, and other agencies. The advocate can accompany you to court; keep you informed about case status; and assist in filing Crime Victim Compensation.